Not dead... just on facebook more

I got an email this week from someone wondering if I moved the blog or did something happen? Whatsup?!

So yeah - like so many others, I have been spending more time on facebook. It isn't an intentional thing... just is.

Anyway - what is up?

I have been off work now going on the second week - because the seizure medication change facilitated by an insurance issue - didn't go well. Like gotta file for short term disability not well.

Other than that - my kid sister - who also is a facebook expert at this point, and the squirrel and I got moved fine. The beloved lab has gone to Heaven to play ball with grandpa, and a new hyper aussie beagle mix has taken her place. (well - as much as a dog can.)

Anyway - more later

Lucky Number 13

Thirteen years ago today, I got married. The divorce was final at the end of April and our son is nine. I thought that when things went downhill, they went fast. With time in between me and that date thirteen years ago, I can see that it was really a slow progression. If I would have been paying attention closer, I would have seen the decline as earlier.

Denial is more than a river in Egypt.

Why do people (myself here ) tend to not notice glaring things? Unlike some, my ex-husband changed over time. A lot of it had to do with his job. A lot of it had to do with his controlling personality that became more pronounced with age. Did it have to do with his job or were my eyes slow to open? Probably a little bit of both.

Now, he has lost all that is important to him. His job and family. Though family has always and will always come after money. He is looking at turning the house that is still in both of our names until his court mandated deadline, over to the bank and declaring bankruptcy. He is turning between moving to another state and leaving the US altogether. Do I care? Yep, but only for the sake of my son who needs a dad. But he needs a father that understands him and is encouraging. He needs a dad that will love him and show him how to be a good father and husband.

I think that my ex-husband can not provide that right now. But perhaps in the future?

I know I am not ready to date or even think about a relationship, but a huge part of me would love to have a male friend that is kind. And kind to my son. Not someone that cusses at him, or makes promises that are not kept... or can be ditched at the offer of OT. I'd like a male friend that can show both my son and I that a nice man exists.

I have to hope that one can exist.

Until later.

Kathleen Carnali BE THERE

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I am just telling you it is so worth your time (and gas.)

Fellowship Missionary Church.
Tillman Road.
7PM
Thursday.

I hate re-runs...

I feel like I was drafted into a war that I didn't know was on.

We had reached that cordial spot. That spot where we were cordial to one another for the sake of our son.

But no... it can't (apparently) last.

My ex-husband has to speak to me in one word sentences, and continually come by unannounced dropping my stuff off.

He just happens to be cleaning.

It does not occur to him that when I am packing and overwhelmed by the chaos in the house I am currently living in that I might not want him dropping off all of the crap that is still at his house. I don't get to pick what I want, mind you, I just get stuff dropped off if he thinks he doesn't want it.

On afterthought... that is kind of how our marriage was.

This Week I... (and it is only mid-week)

1. Taught my son the electric slide.
2. Found out my ex husband was a cheat
3. Punched someone for being vulgar
4. Worried about my job
5. Taught someone how to play an old hymn
6. Have only eaten around 4 meals.
7. Found out who my REAL friends are
8. Begged God to help me
9. prayed more
10. wished I had JQP's phone number (or Flower)
11. made pickled cukes
12. Wondered why (seriously WHY!) i exist
13. Remembered I have a most incredible son and that makes it all better
14. Remembered who I am in the whole plan.
15. made an appointment to get checked for whatever the cheater could have given me.

Thanks for listening

really it isn't as easy as it seems

The house hunt may or may not be coming to a close.
Apparently they don't want to pay the fourty bucks to have the heater inspected to make that we don't die in our sleep this winter.
(It kinda smelled bad when we flipped it on. It was originally a coal burner then converted to oil and now!? it is gas.)

Someone - not me- was screwing someone else while we were married. Found that all out during the holiday weekend.

I should have gone with Mrs. JQP's advice.

So I feel like just dropping the face of the earth. I won't but I feel like it.

in more ways than one.....

The song of the day is:


Well she seemed all right by dawn's early light
Though she looked a little worried and weak
She tried to pretend he wasn't drinkin' again
But daddy left the proof on her cheek
and I was only eight years old that summer
And I always seemed to be in the way
So I took myself down to the fair in town On Independence Day


Well word gets around in a small, small town
They said he was a dangerous man
Mama was proud and she stood her ground
she knew she was on the losin' end
Some folks whispered some folks talked
but everybody looked the other way
when time ran out there was no one about
On Independence Day




CHORUS:Let Freedom ring,let the white dove sing
Let the whole world know that today is a Day of reckoning
Let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong
Roll the stone away, let the guilty pay, it's Independence Day




Well she lit up the sky that fourth of July
By the time that the firemen come
They just put out the flames,and took down some names
And sent me to the county home


Now I ain’t sayin' it's right or it's wrong
but maybe it's the only way
Talk about your revolution It's Independence Day


Repeat Chorus


Roll the stone away
It's Independence Day

It is Independence Day!!

Happy 4th one and all.

Remember (as if you forgot in this national climate...) today is about more than a day off work, parties, BBQs and a time when we LIKED the French, no... this day is about a time when we stood up against a system of tyrany.

A time when we were governed by people who could care less about our lives or if we were alive or dead. A time when the system that governed us only cared about getting their portion of the pie when it was sold. Remember that tea party? Remember the exclamation from many of our youth, "Taxation without representation! It's not fair!"

On this day - I encourage you to send a note or an email to your representative. Do one of two things... Thank them for the job they have done representing you and your area and family. Or tell them WHY they will not get your vote next time.

We are Americans.

Globally some think we are infidels or war mongers or some other negative thing.

Here in the states and abroad, in the minds of some - we have been divided into Bush haters and Bush lovers. I say, if only for one day... let's drop the red state blue state, Obama versus McCain thing and remember that we live in the best place on Earth. While we may not all agree and we criticize each others choices, we have a common steak in our hearts that can not be denied and binds us all together. We are Americans. It does not matter what political end you stand on, today? Today stand on the ground that is yours. Stand on the fact that you are an American.

And when you are done standing? Send that note.

Thanks for reading this far.

Thanks for standing with me.

gosh... the price of a dead body

$4790.00The Cadaver Calculator - Find out how much your body is worth.

Created by OnePlusYou

I think what I think but it isn't what you think I am thinking

I am thinking that volcano state park would be fun.

....

I will have to settle for pokagon. :(

shamelessly ripped off from JQP

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Inland North   You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop."
The Northeast
Philadelphia
The South
The Midland
North Central
Boston
The West
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

lookin' up

Life is flows up and down. But thankfully it is far less roller-coasterish since Joe Cool and I parted ways.

Sure there was that allergic reaction , but hey that is just part of life with a food allergy.

So today - I tip my coffee and bid farewell to the former ride that was my life.